And this is not even an April Fools Day joke! As you are reading this, I’m well on my way back to work. The only catch is I’m starting in Asia and my ship is in the Caribbean. I guess this translates into a ridiculously long itinerary.

A little over a month ago, I had to endure 3 flights which meant I stepped foot on 3 continents over 24 hours and crossed 13 time zones. That sounds like a walk in the park compared with what I will have to do this time: 6 flights over 80 hours!

Admittedly, this involves a 36-hour stopover in Malaysia, but still. I started in Phuket on Friday morning flying to Penang. From there, I flew to Kuala Lumpur. On Sunday, I fly to St Martin via Tokyo, Los Angeles and New York.

Here are a few more stats:

Total flights = 6
Hours flying = 29 hours 20 mins
Hours waiting in airports = 18 hours
Miles = 13936 (slightly more than half the circumference of Earth)

I really wish it was as exciting as it looks on paper. But in reality, these days flying economy is as exotic as taking an inter-city bus. The only difference is you sometimes get free booze on planes and your chances of dying, in the event of an accident are exponentially higher. Sounds like a fair trade-off.

I just hope my luggage makes it to my final destination. Last time an airline lost my bags, I had to resort to wearing women’s underwear!

I think I’m going to get very drunk on the plane(s).